
The Chinese arm of the McLean family (sans Jessie)

Ruston and his 'hawg'
Our life as it happens




















A friend's blog triggered some thinking in me - I feel like there's no way to truly love someone unless you open yourself up to be vulnerable to that person. Unless you let that person in enough so that they are in a place where they could really mess you up if they wanted, they're not in a place where you both can truly learn if you're right for each other.
I'm not saying run around and let people hurt you and hope you eventually meet the right person who won't (that's just plain stupid). But a few things:
1) It's almost by definition - love opens you up to be hurt by that person. If you don't want to hurt, you'll never be able to love fully because you'll never let yourself TRUST that person. If you're afraid of the ball, you'll never be a player.
2) Even if you find that person and you do love each other in that forever ever after way, you're still going to hurt each other. It's gonna' happen. It's a 100% guarantee. The reason you're going to stay together is because you trust that your partner didn't mean it and that they really are sorry. That no matter what happens, life is going to suck more without that person than just sucking it up and dealing and getting over the hurt. The point is that you love that person more than the damage from the hurt inflicted.
I know that I hurt S really badly. But we're together. And it's forever. And I know. We've both handed each other a knife. And though we've accidentally slashed each other at times (I doing more damage than her) we know that it was accidental and that we're always sorry. We don't doubt now that we're going to make it. We just know it. Like we know that the sky is blue or that water is wet.
Trust. Love. Hurt. It happens. But love is the one that makes it all worthwhile.